Dear Bleep,

I hope you are well and enjoying all the wonderful holiday gifts that mother gave you.  I am sure that the fur coat is keeping you warm this winter.  You were always her favorite.  

This pastel plastic pen she gave me is working out rather well to write a postcard. But truly, the Western Union wire was far more useful.  So I as I scribble this note to you under the shadow of Big Ben I simply must ask -

How do you like your watch?

Love Always,

Iffy